I try really really hard not to dream about the people i have crushes on, because when you do, you create someone prefect and they can’t be prefect this is not a prefect world. Then when you finally talk to that person, they aren’t at all what you thought, or wanted, or even needed. In the end you end up very disappointed. This continues to happen with me, this year I thought i really liked this one guy, but i couldn’t even talk to him i was so shy, and every time he looked at me a blushed and couldn’t speak. And finally we started talking and the butterflies went away, I realized that i thought of him more as a friend than as my boyfriend. Don’t get me wrong he is a fantastic person, but i just didn’t feel that way towards him. Instead I realized the person that i actually did like,was his friend and my friend, who thinks i like his friend. But with this person it’s completely different, on a whole new level. I’ve never felt like this towards anyone, not even my boyfriend that i had freshmen year. He’s kind, extremely smart, funny, geeky, and nerdy everything i could want, and everything i could need. All this, but with a catch, mind you there is usually a catch, he’s completely CLUELESS! I’ve become extremely great friends with him, and honestly he hasn’t got a clue, i’ve flirted, hug him, touch his hair (cause apparently thats considered flirting ? idk) and nothing…I even asked him to one of the school dances, and we had a blast i doubt i would have had as much fun with anyone else. That was when i knew that i liked him more than anyone i’ve every liked before, because for the first time in my life, i wanted to kiss him, i wanted to kiss someone without even thinking about it. And with only knowing him a year, but i didn’t some times i wish i had. Though i’m glad i didn’t if i had and he didn’t feel the same i’m not sure if we’d be able to remain friends. And now i’m stuck in the friend zone and can’t seem to get out, and all my friends are telling me to be direct and tell him how i feel, but i’m more cozy with implying things, though i can’t do that with him. He doesn’t pick up on those things. And i do want to date him, i’m just scared of being rejected and ruining this friendship, i’m not sure what to do. So if any of ya’lls have a get-out-of-friend-zone-free card that your not using ;D. But if any of you know how this feels, please send me some advice! :)
love,
mama unicorn
